Those in life who drain all of your energy are referred to as “energy vampires,” which may sound like a term straight out of a Twilight novel, but it's actually a term used in real life.
An energy vampire does not necessarily have to be an enemy; in fact, they might be your best friend. You can tell someone is an energy vampire if you feel exhausted after spending time with them.
They have a tendency to be dramatic, needy, and demanding of a lot of attention. There are 7 distinct kinds of energy vampires out there.
Read on to discover how to recognize each type and how to prevent them from affecting your life.
1. The Narcissist
Narcissists act like the world revolves entirely around them. They think of themselves as more important and deserving than they actually are.
They have an insatiable need to be the focus of attention and demand a lot of praise. Complimenting them is necessary if you want to win their approval.
They are an energy vampire because, according to the textbook definition of narcissism, they are persuasive charmers who know exactly what to say to emotionally seduce you.
How to deal with them:
Lower your expectations of the narcissist's emotional abilities. Narcissists are exceptionally good at convincing others that they possess high levels of intelligence and emotional maturity.
The sooner you realize you're being tricked, the better. Boost the narcissist's ego. Frame your request in a way that can benefit them. This is the only way to deal with a narcissist.
For instance, if your boss is a narcissist and you want to take a few days off of work, you could say to him, “If I take this time off, I will be a more productive employee in the long run,” not just “I need a break.”
2. The Madman
This energy vampire deals with conflict by blaming, attacking, and controlling others, and when around their loved ones, they tend to behave in the worst possible way.
They may say things in the heat of the moment that they will often come to regret saying later on. They are energy vampires, especially for empaths as they are more likely to experience emotional overload as a result of yelling, arguments, and loud noises.
How to deal with them:
Let them know they're being heard. Then tell them the only way to deal with the problem is by first calming down.
Say something along the lines of “I want to help you, but I have a hard time listening when you're in this state” is something that is recommended.
Stay calm. Resist the urge to respond angrily to someone who is already yelling at you, as strong as the temptation may be. Your energy will be wasted, and the situation will get even more difficult if you react rashly.
Immediately leave the room. Or, a better option would be to ask the person to leave if they keep screaming.
By establishing boundaries, you are letting energy vampires in your life know that you will not stand for their behavior.
3. The Victim
You've probably met people like this before: those who believe the world is against them and who take any chance they get to complain about how terrible life is for them.
They are energy vampires. These are the types of people who often refuse to accept responsibility for the issues that arise in their lives and who expect their loved ones to bail them out whenever something goes wrong.
The thing is, each of us is dealing with our own issues. So when someone is a burden to you with their problems, it can feel incredibly exhausting.
How to deal with them:
Establish boundaries while maintaining compassion. It's not that you don't want the people in your life to be happy; it's just that it's not your job to act as a therapist for them.
If there is someone in your life who always plays the victim role, you should try to reassure them that even though you are on their side, it is impossible for you to be there for them at all times.
Use the three-minute phone call. Here's how: After giving your friend or family member a few moments of your attention, you should say something along the lines of “I support you, but I can only listen for a few minutes if you keep bringing up the same topics. Maybe you could find a therapist to help you.”
4. The Drama Queen
These people completely overwhelm you with their never-ending drama. They believe that their problems are more important than those of other people.
Some people develop an addiction to drama. This addictive behavior must not be tolerated.
How to deal with them:
Don't ask them how they are doing. Of course, you can occasionally ask someone how they are doing, but the point is that you shouldn't engage in the conversation if you get the impression that your friend is calling you to tell you an exaggerated story.
You can “completely miss” their text or get too caught up with work to return their calls. Avoid becoming engrossed in their story.
Drama queens love seeing your reaction to their dreams, but they won't get anything out of it if you maintain your composure.
They will eventually lose interest and look for someone else to feed their drama if you stay calm.
5. The Control Freaks and Critics
These people are constantly giving opinions nobody asked them for, such as, “You know what you should be doing…?”
Then they tell you whether you want to listen to their advice or not. Or, they keep talking about the things that they think you're doing wrong.
It's one thing to offer constructive criticism, but if the comment is malicious or just doesn't make sense, it's not helpful.
How to deal with them:
Be confident. However, telling these individuals what to do will only make them defensive. Tell them, “I appreciate your advice, but I want to think about how to approach this situation for myself.”
This will show that you are taking responsibility for your own actions.
6. The Nonstop Talker
This person is an energy vampire simply because they do not leave you enough time or space to breathe. Even if you have excellent listening skills, being around someone who never stops talking can wear you out to the point where you have no idea what they are talking about.
Those who enjoy what they do are especially susceptible to falling victim to this kind of energy vampire because, above all else, they want to be a good friend and conversation partner.
How to deal with them:
Interrupt them. This can be really hard, but nonstop talkers don't respond to nonverbal cues like looking impatient or restless.
You need to interrupt them in a persistent manner if you want to get your point across. Use humor.
You wouldn't use this strategy in a large meeting at your workplace, but when you're talking to people you know well, jokingly saying something like, “The clock is ticking” can be a serious but light-hearted way to indicate that you'd like to have your opinion heard.
7. Passive-aggressive People
We all know this type of person. The person who appears to be sincere but is actually unreliable, someone who smiles while expressing their anger, or insists that they are fine even though it is clear that they are angry.
They will promise you anything, but then they do what they want. People who engage in passive-aggressive behavior are a drain on your energy because they refuse to acknowledge when something is wrong.
As a result, you spend a lot of time either attempting to decipher how they are truly feeling or going out of your way to make sure that they are fine.
How to deal with them:
Trust your gut instinct. Your reaction to a passive-aggressive person should not be to question whether their anger is real. If you cannot get a direct answer, ask the person to clarify their position.
Helen is the founder of Spiritualify.org where she covers all things astrology — from horoscopes and zodiac guides to retrograde alerts and moon updates. She also writes about other mystical lifestyle topics, such as numerology, crystal healing, tarot, dream interpretation, and more.
